2013년 11월 1일 금요일

Syble Townsel's blog ::RED SOX MAKE FRONT OFFICE CHANGES






Syble Townsel's blog ::RED SOX MAKE FRONT OFFICE CHANGES










The               Red               Sox               don't               need               a               trainer.

They               need               a               psychologist.

They               need               to               add               an               extra               coach,               the               Heimlich               coach.

Forget               about               steroids.

They               need               Prozac               for               their               depression.

They               need               to               get               a               GPS               system               for               their               pitchers               to               help               them               find               home               plate.

Their               base               runners               have               been               stranded               more               often               than               Gilligan               and               the               Skipper.

If               the               Red               Sox               were               a               ship,               they               would               be               called               the               Titanic.

A               stocking               can               produce               more               runs               than               the               Red               Sox.

Forget               about               giving               the               outfielders               gloves.

Give               them               fishing               nets.

Maybe               then               they               catch               a               common               fly               ball.

Batting               gloves?

In               the               Red               Sox               organization               they               call               them               strike               out               gloves.

The               Red               Sox               pitchers               are               like               cheap               steak,               they               always               get               pounded.
               Take               away               the               Red               Sox               bats,               give               them               to               a               kid's               league.

The               Red               Sox               aren't               even               using               them.

Replace               the               bats               with               shovels               so               they               can               dig               themselves               deeper               into               last               place.
               Heck               the               Red               Sox               don't               even               put               the               player's               name               on               the               back               of               their               jerseys.

Can               you               blame               them?
               Send               over               a               stable               of               horses.

The               team               has               been               wearing               horse               collars               all               year.
               Put               in               the               bat               boy.

Put               in               the               ball               boy.

Maybe               start               the               ground               crew.That               lady               who               sang               the               National               Anthem               could               be               the               starting               pitcher.

Heck               you               couldn't               do               worse.
               Ballclub?

This               is               a               Bawl               Club,               they               have               only               been               successful               at               making               the               fans               cry.
               Put               this               team               in               urgent               care.

Hook               them               up               the               IVs.

Check               their               pulse.

Can               you               even               hear               a               heartbeat?

This               team               does               not               need               life               support.

It               needs               to               call               in               Dr.

Kevokian               and               be               put               out               of               its               misery.

Bring               up               the               Triple               AAA               club.

What               could               happen               ?

They               would               end               up               in               last               place.

Whoops               the               Red               Sox               are               already               there.
               7.17?

That's               not               an               ERA.

Sounds               like               a               jumbo               jet.

But               7.17               is               the               pitching               staff's               combined               ERA.

7.17               sounds               like               an               earthquake.

The               pitching               staff               is               so               bad,               they               couldn't               put               a               cat               out.
               A               good               bullpen               comes               in               and               puts               the               fire               out.

The               Red               Sox               pitchers               bring               a               can               of               gasoline               and               a               blow               torch.
               The               Red               Sox               payroll               is               $164               million.

That's               the               worse               investment               since               the               Obama               bailout               plan.

The               way               the               Red               Sox               are               hitting,               it               is               costing               them               about               a               million               dollars               a               hit.

As               a               team               they               are               batting               .231..

That               is               a               line               up               where               Stevie               Wonder               could               bat               fourth.
               Investing               $164               million               in               this               team               is               the               worse               Red               Sox               decision               since               they               traded               Babe               Ruth.

This               team               is               so               bad,               they               need               to               fly               the               Red               Sox               banner               at               half-mast               the               rest               of               the               season.




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